Monday, July 12, 2010

While the editor is away: The Big Cripple Show

Don't worry, your trusty editor, Mr. John Sharkey III will be back tomorrow. Aussies still seem to be figuring out the internet down there (I hear they just discovered geocities), so your friend and ours has given me the power to keep the blog going for today. It's good news though because the Phils have pulled out another win and a sweep. Great way to start off the all star break, hell even the O's are finally winning some games.

First off we all know that the Phils hitting has been shitty to say the least. Its nice to see the bullpen pitch 21 straight scoreless innings. While I personally don't see a silver lining in the hitting any time soon, Hamels, Kendrick, and Halladay proved to the Phillies faithful that your boys are not down and out. Watching the highlights of this series pitching wise was the equivalent of hearing from my soon to be wife tell me that she'll never force me to watch another Episode of True Blood ever again, pure joy.

J Roll of course came through with the only score (and with his score the day before, I seem to be seeing a trend here). While it might not have been the ass pounding I would have loved to see the Phils deliver before the break, J Roll coming through only underscored the fact that great pitching can make piss poor offense look like gold.

Of course my heart sank a little during the 3rd inning when a fan interfered with Ruiz' hit. I call bullshit of course, but the double stood. This of course brings back the Orioles playoff disaster in the 90s, which even your shittiest of Yankees fan knows was bullshit. I can't seem to find a video of Ruiz interference, but here's the RBI that won the game, be proud:

Well thats all, your editor will be back tomorrow. I know this is isn't the best analysis in the world, but I just got the text an hour ago to do this. So I'll leave you with my theme song when  I write for the blog, a choice cut from Mr. Neil Young. Don't worry though, this isn't one of the new songs about youtube links and going to in n' out burger. You'll be seeing a mid season O's analysis written by your friendly cripple here very soon thanks to your editor. As good ol' Sharko would say: fuck the Mets, fuck New York, and fuck Aussie internet. Till next time followers

--The Cripple

1 comment:

  1. This is your Editor speaking. Big ups to The Cripple for covering while the country I live in tries to catch up with the internet technology standards of Laos. I'll be back tomorrow to discuss this years Home Run Derby and whether or not they asked Bud Selig's Viagra to particiapte before shooting Nick Swisher an email.