Wednesday, August 18, 2010

August 17 2010 PHI v SF Game 1. Senor Clutch And The Wild Bunch

Shit, Followers.....I'm glad we got that over with. The first game of this series was the crucial win. Working from the hole always makes me queasy and I have no time for that horseshit anymore. I write this clog a mildly relieved man but it won't last fucking long. We still have Joe Blanton on the mound tonight, HA!  wacka, wacka, wacka....I kid, I kid, F's. We are the fucking motherfucking best! The anxiety still never ends....But what the fuck, let's enjoy being a game up in the wild card race and red-hot on the heels of the atl racists cockboats with Chase Fucking Utley back where he belongs.

Roy Oswalt had quite the touched-up start last night, giving up 2 early runs as a result of a fucking lead-off double and a solo shot from Pat The Bat Burrell. The Burrell homer doesn't hurt so much now that we've won, it's almost kind of bittersweet and heart warming to see him doing so well but don't ask me to feel like this too often about an opponent. We still believe here at TBSS that NO MERCY is the only policy.

Oswalt calmed the fuck down after the first and only gave up one more run in the 7th . He pitched 7 hard, gave up 3 earned and struck out 7. Quality start, motherfucker. More than we can say for SF's Barry Zito.

After 4 scoreless innings the roof caved in for Zito. J-Roll and Victorino had 2-run hits in both the 5th and the 6th inning mugging SF of a lead that would never return. Zito was sent to the fridge without recording an out in the 6th.

The big retarded run inning came in the 8th when the Phils tacked on 5 runs.

SF's Chris Ray loaded the fucking bases with no outs immediately clearing the path for Carlos Motherfucking Ruiz to do what he does fucking best these days; clutch hit. Senor Clutch. This little fucker and today's Hoagie of Heat recipient drove home 3 runs with a big base clearing double off the left field wall. That's just what he does. He takes no shit from reliever or retriever alike. Suck shit. 7-3.

2 more runs would go on to score from a fucking balk and an error to bring things to a nice 9-3 scoreline going into 9th for Chad Durbin to end nicely. In lead situations I'd have no one else pitch my 7th inning. Wait this was the 9th. Fuck it. Chase Utley gets a righteous win for his first day of work in almost 8 weeks and the Phillies now sit a full game ahead of SF in th NL Wild Card standings. Decent.

Chutley went 0-5 but still got the bat on the ball a bit and showed no signs of restraint or weariness to get his fucking hands dirty. Only a man of his large-sacked calibre could come back a week early and not whinge like a princess when it came time to do the dirty. I think we'll be seeing good things from our latest class-A call up.

Timmy Lincecum signed a bunch of autographs for the little kiddies before the game leading me to believe is a real man. I'm a sucker for nice guys in baseball as much as I like assholes. I'm also fucking glad we don't have to face this prick.

No music or funny crap today, Followers. The dressing from my ass-wound as been coming off at the ends so I have to soak in the tub for a few hours until the rest peels off. Seriously. This shit is almost over.

Until next time, fuck new york and fuck KY-Rod. Don't expect to get paid if you're gonna get hurt being an asshole. Off the field. DISQUALIFIED, BITCH!!!


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