Finger me silly! Boy o boy that was a roughing up. Rant with me will you, Followers..... This game here I am discussing, the one in which the LA Dodgers took us on a 15 run fist-fuck-ride, is just another immense piece of glaring evidence of the Phillies truest weekness; The Bullpen.
The Phillies has the least bullpen innings pitched in the entire National League and for good reason. Aside from Kendrick, who's manly charade as of late evaporated quickly over the course of his 3+ inning yesterday, the starters know they have to get most of it done themselves. Yesterday was the most perfect example with the bulk of those 15 runs charged to the Bullpen. The added pressure on starters has to be fucking retarded. "Oh shit, I better shut out this inferior bunch of sissies because the almost more inferior group of lightweights will surely fuck it up for everyone" must run through Halladay's and Hamel's mind as he works with his as of late 1 run of support.
Not that I'm bitching about the offense in this situation, they did exactly what they were supposed to. 9 runs would've been fucking just dandy any other day.
The Brown Fucking Dominator got his first big league dinger and drove in 4 RBIs. The kids got some defensive issues to work out but that will come with time. He's crawling just fine with the big boys.
Did I mention Gloss Load yet? No, that motherfucker has been just what the sperm bank ordered. He almost put us back in the game yesterday with his 3 run homer in the 5th bring the score to a 3 run deficit. It wasn't until recently recalled Antonio Bastardo-- the man to handle the tough LA lefties when Kendrick shit bed-- ruined every paying customer's fun with a 4 run 6th like the little girl that he is. I kid, I'm typing here but he did stick it up the ass of the man who walks to the plate to Sanitarium.
Perhaps we're not utililzing the roster we have at present correctly. Contreras has been more consistent as has Madson. Scott Mathieson is wallowing on the farm throwing 97 just waiting to be groomed, with a little help that man could be murder. Fat Mike Zagurski had less of the stellar fucking first run but shows potential for not olny good innings but a funny t-shirt. We have options but it turns into a fucking nightmare fuck fest every time we need them. We basically are keeping Herndon and Baez around to clean up the jizz on the jack-booth floor, what's the fucking point? Dubee could ostensibly do what they do. It's just a mess back there. Fuck it, do 'em like the Americans like; just level it all and start again.
Whatever, we've got one of the strongest 1-2-3 punches in the Majors, we got the guns of power and strength and we've got a bench to back the battle-axes when they need sharpening. All we have to work on next in the off-season is filling those several holes in the fuck back on the ball park and we'll be unstoppable. I'm not complaining, it's just the last aspect that needs tending to.
Fuck it, tonight Os gets his home debut. Something tells me the score won't be so fucking high on the LA side of things. They are truly a bunch of pansies. 9 runs should do the trick.
Here at TBSS we love music, especially kick-ass music. Here's a video Scotty, staff music editor, hipped me to earlier this week. It's an early Alice In Chains demo track entitled Lip-Lock Rock. It kicks ass. Enjoy! My favorite part is when Layne says "skibbity bop o wop dowop" and then the horns kick in!
I hope this songs gets you pumped for action like it gets me ready for battle! My blood sugar has been low all day. Fuck new york and send in your chocolate cake recipes. Best one gets a free phone call from me during the middle of the night!