Today, followers, we all witnessed Jamie The LawnMoyer Man make history by being the oldest motherfucker to toss a shut-out complete game dethroning Satchel Paige. Moyer, at 47, smoked the fuck out of - I quote staff contributor Chuck Meehan - "those tomahawk chopping piss-ants" giving up only 2 hits off a 105 pitches and 9 innings pitched. Whats up. It was a thing a beauty, watching the ball dance like a Braves fan on check day. Granpa still can get it going for the big show. My bobble-head is raging!
The Knaves came to town not expecting a full onslaught from both fronts. For the second game in a fucking row The Rooster propels a 3-run jack into the stars further feeding the monkey on Amaro jr's back. This man better have a contract, a quill pen and the blood of a virgin waiting for Werth as soon as he gets done at Hooters tonight!
The 5th inning brought more pain for the 'necks in the form of a billion hit inning seeing Polly, Chut and Big Piece each single, loading them up for Rauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul to line-drive to left that turned into double on a shit throw. 5-0. Bobby Cox saw it fit to walk The Landscaper of Sanity, Carlos Ruiz, to load them back up for Exxon Valdex to spill more oil onto the reservation! This "3rd stringer" ground one up the middle and brings home 2 more. 7-0. Even our substitute for a substitute is 'em driving home!
End Result. Booyah.
My dear Followers, todays gonna be a short one cause I got the man's business to handle so I leave you with a video so intense it rivals Moyer's performance! Before we hired staff contributor Chuck Meehan to bring the heat here at TBSS he served time in college rock band and Philly favorite, YDI. Charles is smashing the 4-string like a motherfucker:
Tomorrow's clog, Followers, will feature a video walk through of the National Library of Australia narrated by your sweet editor. Stay glued to the monitor for that one! Until then, fuck new york and thank God you're not a country boy!