Man, if I've learned anything in the last few days of my newly found fatherhood is that the dad's main role for the first few days of the new little thing's life is basically to be the mother's publicist. I feel like I should've just written a press release with time of birth, weight, hair/eye color, sex, penis size and the like. This thought did actually cross my mind but then I thought that my son deserved better treatment that a waning porn stud coming off an industry HIV scare. I satiate the masses with this photo. JS4, watch out, pricks! Now please back the fuck off. Shit, let's get to the game, I'm tired.
My main man,Chooch, getting her done with a walk off in the 10th sealing the win at 2-1 over the Cards after a long, impecable day of work for Comcast Hamels! I love this man. Not in a gay way but a hetero as fuck way. I have called this great little man many a complimentary things in the last 3 years. The Dishwasher Of Death or Panamanian Pain just to name a few but now I officially dub him what you the Followers will refer to him as from here on in: THE LANDSCAPER OF SANITY! Todays game report really just belongs to L.O.S. and L.O.S. alone. A night of pitching is fun for the statisticians and GM's but I've got mouths to feed. Hamels and Lidge did have great performances on the mound tonight despite a few outings I would deem "unacceptable" or "girl-shit". The show of force they displayed tonight returned to the look of 2008 by dominating the batters with confidence. I wonder what music Hamel's downloaded using Comcast internet to get him pumped for the game? " Call my grandmother in California...." Keep it churnng full-on into tomorrow. I don't want to have 2 negative Kendrick entries in a row but I will print out a shot of Kyle and have JS4 do the deed on it if we see what we got last Friday. But enough negativity........
Tomorrow brings me back to the grindstone of the Naitonal Library of Australia because the little man is coming home finally. Welcome Home Nathan Jr. The Pedophile Photos that I have been promising will be taken and posted tomorrow. I'm sure you understand the delay. Until Then fuck new york and get tased like a man!