Tuesday, June 8, 2010
June 7 2010 PHI v SD Game 4. We Were Werthless
I never took into account what it actually meant to have to write about your team day in, day out. I never really thought about the buckets of agony I would be pouring over my body as a result of forcing myself into a situation where I had to analyze a happening that made me physically ill, the lose. These last few weeks of Phillies baseball has made it abundantly clear just how much true fans suffer for their art when they sit down to write one of these stupid things.
"Fuck, man..... you know, I should write a blog about the one thing I love the most that nobody understands the way I do, The Phillies! Shucks, I love the team and it'd be fun to pretend to be a real sports writer minus the pomposity and shrivelled cock! Yeah, I'll call it The Big Sharkey Show and speak in basics about the boys victories and woes! Fuck this is gonna be an awesome way to avoid my nagging pain-in-the-ass wife for at least an hour a day. Man, I'm set up. And they make it so fucking easy with this blogspot.com place. I'll never get tired of writing about The Phillies. Are you kidding me? Pffffftt. World Fucking Champions!!!"
Then a game like yesterday happens on the heels of a pretty shitty loss and I just want to give it the fuck up. I know, Followers.... where else would you get the kind of genius wit and observation that you find here at TBSS? Is there another known purveyor of sarcastic fatherly love that you show to this rag-tag group of lovable jags everyday? For free? Nope. There isn't. So here I type. After watching a game that sees Cole Hamels un-hit until the 7th inning and about 45 men left stranded on base in Phillies uniform. 2 solo shots of the bats of Padres Gonzales and Hairston is a weak time but still a solid start and a little run support would've gone a long fucking way at that point. I knew all those men left standing on base would come back to haunt us. Jayson Werth, I would love to call you a cunt to your face and then buy you a beer for grounding into a double play with the bases loaded in the bottom 1st. Then striking out with tying run in your hands in the bottom 9th. And where the fuck were the rest of you assholes? You had to leave it to Big Piece to score the team's sole run with 2 outs in the bottom of the ninth, didn't you? Too little, too shit. Fucking disgraceful. Honestly disgusting. Fuck you all in the ass except for Hamels until tomorrow. I can't stay mad about this shit for more than a few hours. I already feel better.
Please, Phillies. Let's try to capitalize on this Marlins series we start tomorrow. I am now going to the gym where I will wail on my pecks and hate every single person around me. Like a normal adult does at the gym. until tomorrow, F's, fuck new york and fuck this.