Friday, October 22, 2010

NLCS PHI v SF Game 5. Gas Up The Jet, Dickheads!!!!

That's right, motherfuckers! We're bringing the series back to Phucking CItizens Bank Park with big dickin' Roy Oswalt waiting in a tree-stand with his cross hairs ready to be filled with the head of that prick Cody Ross. Weee, a run on sentence. I must be excited. The Phillies Phight behind our big daddy Roy Halladay to defeat Tim Lincecum and live another day. We also get to hear that stupid fucking Kid Rock song for at least one more night. Something, could be my tingling balls, tells me we'll hear that song for a few more nights. Neon Nights.

What did everybody (including fucking me) say before the start of this series? We all said it would go to fucking 7, most said the Phillies would take it and as of now that's still very plausible. The giant wankers land in Philly to face a pitcher that's undefeated at CBP and a crowd ready to rip them limb from smarmy limb. I don't envy anyone on that team, they thought they had the balls in their mouth in sf before last night even began. At least we get a chance to have them on our turf after all their weak fans had a chance to eat the Phils alive. There is blood in the water and this Shark is ready to feast.

Seriously, fuck Pat Burrell. What a cunt. Has anyone else been noticing his vengeful demeanor throughout this series? Like that fruit has anything to be bitter about. We give that cocky shit a ring and all he can do is pull shit like jawing to Halladay after whiffing or making unsportsmanlike gestures towards the Phils any chance he can. That's actually disrespectful and I'm not one to make bones about that sort of namby-pamby horseshit. I want Burrell to fail. His flagrant ostentation's has to be punished and Chollie has to know it. His is among the many egos on that san fran team that needs checking and it's fucking time to kill.

Follower Karen sent me this photo to "modify". This is art, Karen. This is for you.

Tammy Wynette. This is classy. Too good for this D-O-R-K--F-U-C-K. 

I got really nothing to say about this nor do I think that a paint-job would have any lasting effect. Nick fucking Jr, Candyland shit.

How fucking good were Madson and Lidge last night, Followers? For real, Madson was just like "suck my bloated prikc, meat-of-the-order!" Posey, K. Piece of shit Burrell, K. Cody Gloss, FUCKING K. Domination Station. Fuck the Grateful Dead. That's right. Fuck them.

Then bad motherfucker Lidge just comes in and shatters these cunts....MAN. MANLY MAN. With the help of Werth's 9th inning fucking big cock blast Lidge has all the breathing room necessary to paint jizz all over the faces f these sf wine-cooler drinkers.

So Saturday can't come faster for me, F's. I'm really feeling this whole giants are gonna choke theory right now and how could I not? The Phillies are a play-off proven team with the last two match-ups in our favor. Oswalt beat Sanchez in Game 2 and Caine has been more banged up than Courtney Love's veins at CBP. This could be another one of those magical post-season fairy tales that the ESPN film makers cum over for decades to come. Or it could be bad. I'm feeling good, though. Our Phillies are not going down without a large-dicked sword fight with these pricks.

It's Friday, people. Let's get good and liquored up. Tug McGraw used to pitch his best games hung-over. I watch my best games the same.

Fuck new york, sf, Pat Burrell, Cody Ross and kiss your wife or partner on the pussy tonight.


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